The Rules Of Dating

You've gone on the first date and things went smoothly {Thanks to The Rules Of The First Date, yes?} and now you're going on more dates; second, third, fourth, fifth...

Here are the rules of dating -

The Chase. Girls, play hard to get. Yes, we said it. Research has proven that men love the chase so, don't sell yourself short. Nothing good comes easy, so neither should you. Don't be too available by planning your life around him - make other plans and stop sitting around waiting for his calls or texts. If his plans are not convenient for you, reschedule. Guys, we know you love the chase so the girls will give you the satisfaction. You're welcome!

Investigate. Google him/her and find out as much as you can about the person. Ask family and friends that may know about him/her. Facebook will help you identify mutual friends you can talk to. The earlier you know what's going on that may be a deal-breaker, the sooner you can make a decision on how to handle it and the less whatever it is might hurt and the quicker you can move on. 
PS - Girls, don't bother talking to his close friends. They always stick up for each other and won't tell you anything the guy doesn't want you to know. Can't say same for girls and their close friends though... *sigh*

Align your expectations. Define what you are doing and where it's going... and by define, we mean 'talk about it'. Are you interested in a relationship? Are you just hanging out as friends? What kind of strings are attached? Don't just assume or go with the flow because that's how you end up investing time and energy in someone, only to see their wedding pictures on Facebook.

Respect each other. You're going to discover that you have differences on some matters and that's okay. Nobody can be exactly like you, deal with it. If you can't, then why do you want to be with someone anyway?

Respect boundaries. Don't invade each other's privacy - snooping on phones and social media accounts and stuff without permission. Aside from the fact that you could actually find what you're looking for (which in most cases will confirm some of your fears), it is wrong. If you feel something is going on, discuss it and take the response you get... until proven otherwise because sooner or later, you'll find out anyway. For the girls, don't underestimate the female intuition... trust your instincts. if you suspect something is amiss, then something most probably is. Again, investigate!

Have real conversations. This is the time to discuss beliefs, values, principles, goals, ethics etc. Weather and sports talks were for the first date, this is when you should really get to know the person behind the cute face and nice clothes.

Have a life. Don't forget yourself as an individual; maintain your individual interests and stay happy with yourself. How do you want to find happiness with someone if you ain't happy with yourself first?

Be honest. Don't make promises you don't plan to keep. If you start lying, you'll have to tell more lies to cover up the previous lies and you'll be caught in a web of lies, which will eventually unravel and that's how you end up old and alone with many cats.

Don't act desperate. Don't start marking territories and stuff, those moves hint at insecurity and desperation. You'll make the other person feel watched and manipulated and that's a recipe for disaster. Plus, what are you doing with someone with whom you feel the need to be establishing your presence? They are lucky to have you, they should be the one to let it known that they are with you.

Stay fit. Just because you think you've found someone doesn't mean you can now let yourself go. Eat healthy, be well groomed, stay active and drink lots of water!


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  1. This rules r important o. Dating is hard enof abeg. After all d struggle, you will now come n find out dat your just his side chick

  2. Very helpful tips....Just what i needed I'm guilty of territory establishments....I gradually move a full suitcase of clothes into your house...Lol.