How Not To Wear The Ripped, Distressed Jeans

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While we are waiting for the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show to air tomorrow the 8th of December(Yay! Who else is excited?) let's talk about distressed jeans or ripped jeans or torn jeans or whatchamacallit jeans.

Let's also note that since this distressed jeans fashion trend is widely accepted, then it means there's hope for Kanye West's 2nd Yeezy Collection  - sometime in the future maybe.

While we have nothing against distressed jeans - everyone has the right to do whatever they want to their clothes - we do have the right to go all Fashion Police on you if you wear it wrong. So here are 4 small caveats for this fashion trend as far as we are concerned... and these apply to both males and females.

You're not allowed to reveal cellulite/stretch marks. Hello? If you're tempting us with sneak peeks of your legs, then the peeks better be worth it. It's okay to have stretch marks, most of us do. We just don't want them peeking back at us through your jeans - especially for more open cut-outs.

You're not allowed to be shy. Sorry, if you're not going to wear them confidently then you really shouldn't wear them at all. Don't go wearing a long long top over the jeans. No honey, uh uh. We want to see the jeans... and skin. You have to rock those babies!

You're not allowed to wear tights/cycling shorts underneath. This one is puzzling. Why would you wear distressed jeans intended to show off skin and then hide the skin with something else? Why won't you just wear regular jeans? No, we don't want to see whatever you're wearing through the cut-outs/rips and that includes your panties/boxers! Well, except you're really in distress.

You are not allowed to do it yourself if it's just going to look like you did it yourself. It has to look original - unintentionally torn and frayed. If it screams DIY, it's just plain tacky and we don't want that for you. If you must do it yourself, learn to do it right here or see video tutorials here!

That's it. Got something to say? Let us know in the comments.




  1. Ripped jeans... never quite understood the craze for ripped jeans though.

  2. LOL. Different strokes for different folks eh?

  3. Dats very true. Pple are cuttingtheir jeans by demselves and is very very obvious. they should go and buy orginal abeg

  4. The thing about it is that if you don't get it right, you would look like you are some homeless girl. I refer to my Stretch marks as tiger stripes for personal motivation.

    1. Yeup, there's a very fine line there that's very easy to cross.